Movie Monday – Magic Mike, Bernie

I’m probably going to surprise a few of you. I did NOT like Magic Mike. I do NOT find grabbing of crotches and crotch thrusting sexy or attractive. Channing Tatum can dance. That’s for sure. I love and appreciate the dancing – the parts before the crotch thrusting. I guess I’m just not your average girl. I find Mad Men infinitely more sexy. (I’ve been catching up on Season 5 lately. Completely intoxicating.) I’d rather see a man up to his elbows in grease or sweat. I like to see men as men and near naked bodies crudely simulating sex on a stage, or even more horrifying, in the face or lap of an audience member, do not seem manly to me. It’s not feminine, but it’s not masculine to me either. A friend surprised me with a trip to a strip club before my wedding (never having been before) and tried to put me on stage like the many girls onstage in the movie. I was not having it. I was so uncomfortable and turned off. I thought the whole atmosphere was creepy. To my surprise, I felt the same way about this movie. I think that I thought it would be more glamorous and classy in a movie, the way I’ve always thought a Vegas show or Chippendale type show would be classy. But it’s not. It’s dirty and rude and not a healthy, positive lifestyle for the dancers. I’m completely horrified to recall the many articles and blogs I read when Magic Mike was in the theater about audiences full of women cheering and whooping right along with the audience in the film. I can’t relate. I felt uncomfortable just watching it at home alone. All the flesh I really care to see is maybe a bare chest and some rippling back and arm muscles. Some bulging biceps in a tight shirt is a nice treat too. I enjoy Matthew McConaughey and Channing Tatum as actors and they sure aren’t bad on the eyes, but I much prefer to leave more to the imagination.

I have mixed feelings about Bernie. I knew very little about it, aside from the fact that it was based on a true story and that it was filmed documentary style, which I forgot until I started watching – and didn’t particularly enjoy. It was an interesting movie but I don’t know if I could say I liked it. I was bored to tears for a good portion of the beginning. It started to get my attention halfway through and then the latter half was more engaging. Jack Black’s performance has been hailed as “penetrating” and “detailed” but award-worthy performances don’t really make a movie for me. I suppose you could say my taste is not sophisticated enough in that sense. I can appreciate what the makers of this movie were trying to do and according to many critics they did it exceedingly well. However, I didn’t find the “dark humor” of the film funny in the least, and I find it disturbing that the take away (for me) was that Marjorie got what she deserved for being such a terrible, mean old bitty.

The human body is the best work of art.
~ Jess C. Scott



  1. Jessica, I’m right with you. There were no strippers at my bachlorette party (we went to Maui for a long weekend). I have no problem with the naked or near naked men, but the thrusting and crotch-grabbing is ick. Gives me the church giggles. Also, there only seems to be ONE body type embraced by these dancers and I find men’s bodies in their variety of forms to be attractive. I think most of these clubs miss the boat on that aspect. Another good post!


  2. Tell us how you REALLY feel 😉 I completely agree with you and haven’t seen Magic Mike, I have absolutely no intention to do so. Matter of fact, I turned off my talk shows whenever they were doing the press run.


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